Ten things you never want to overhear your movers say

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ten things you don't want to hear your movers sayI refuse to personally move my things whenever I change domiciles.  I despise heavy lifting and anything that makes me sweaty, so moving boxes just isn’t my thing.

I also refuse to help friends move.  This may make me sound snobby but if they were my real friends they wouldn’t ask me to help them move.

They’d ask me if I wanted their extra New Kids On The Block concert tickets.

Hopefully a move isn’t anywhere in my near future, unless it’s to a de-luxe apartment in the sky….as long as said apartment has a doorman and a private pool.

Since I always use movers, I’ve learned a thing or two about what you do and don’t want to overhear your movers discussing.  Trust me, your granny panties is on the list of things you don’t want to hear your movers discussing; especially when they’re comparing floral patterns.

Ten things you definitely don’t want to overhear your movers say

  1. That looked so cool when it shattered on the ground.
  2. These people might have a problem.  Did you see they packed almost everything in wine boxes?
  3. I’m glad we got her to sign that liability waiver.
  4. I’m sure some Elmer’s glue will put this right back together again.
  5. I bet they won’t miss this….
  6. I sure hope that wasn’t an heirloom.
  7. That gash in the wall was totally there before we got here.
  8. Maybe we could “lose” all the boxes with liquor in them.
  9. This new house of theirs is a real dump.
  10. That raccoon was in the house when we got here, right?
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About Lisa Newlin

Lisa is a humor blogger who plays an unconvincing lawyer in real life. She a blog, http://lisanewlin.com, that you should read religiously. Lisa shouldn't be allowed around sharp objects, anything breakable, or anything with carbohydrates. She prefers dogs over most people, and food over most everything. Her husband tolerates her, but she’s not sure why. Lisa writes for NickMom.com and HumorOutcasts.com. Her work has been featured on Erma Bombeck and in thePowderRoom. She also writes a syndicated newspaper column about the funnier sides of practicing law. She co-authored the best selling anthologies “I Just Want To Be Alone” and “You’ve Got Lipstick On Your Teeth.” Her blog, http://lisanewlin.com, will make you feel better about your own life. It will also remind you that vodka is the answer to everything, except if the question is "What should I throw on this fire?" Then the answer is definitely NOT vodka.

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