You can tell a lot about people from their belongings — from the details of how they decorate to what you find on their bookshelves or in their junk drawers. But perhaps even more telling is what they keep in a storage unit. No matter the appearance, this is no haphazard pile of crap: these are items carefully chosen for long-term safekeeping.
So, if you were given the chance, whose unit would you like to see? Of which complex mind would you hope to glimpse the inner-workings? What’s that you say? The world’s five most bloodthirsty dictators? It just so happens we have access to the very personal and completely factual list of items belonging to the Fearsome Five. Let’s see if you can match the former dictator to the contents of his storage unit.
a) Joseph Stalin
b) Adolf Hitler
c) Saddam Hussein
d) Mao Zedong
e) Kim Jong-Il
The Stuff They Saved:
1. Comprehensive collection of Taylor Swift cds and fan memorabilia, Crayola Masterworks art set, detailed map of Poland, dartboard covered with pictures of puppies and kittens, mustache comb.
2. Dog-eared copy of The Communist Manifesto, handsome assortment of fur hats, mustache comb, vodka, Easy Bake Oven.
3. Pen pal letters written with Alec Baldwin, Costco tub of pomade, missing nuclear warheads, complete DVD collection of North and South, game of Risk with only the blue pieces included, several copies of David Marcum’s Egonomics, Bingo set.
4. Mustache comb (a disturbing trend is emerging), 20 full oil drums, an array of dashing khaki outfits, unfinished manuscript entitled 1001 Uses for Sand, crudely drawn map of the “New and Much Larger Iraq”, half-assembled furniture from IKEA’s ‘as-is’ department.
5. Buddhism for Assholes, 12 cans of red paint, Stalin’s annotated copy of The Communist Manifesto, hundreds of unused toothbrushes, rhyming dictionary, boxes of t-shirts screen printed with ‘Can I Get a Permanent Revolution Here?’
We’ll give you a minute to get your answers figured out.
Finished yet? Ok then… time to check your answers.
Answers: 1. b) 2. a) 3. e) 4. c) 5. d)
So how did you do? These surprising revelations may take some time to sink in. Just remember, when choosing your items for long-term storage, someone will eventually see them after you die and all your secrets will be out.